It’s Thursday morning, and you know what that means! It’s laundry day, and I’m still going to the laundromat because my basement isn’t finished yet. Soon, hopefully! We had the drywall delivered on Wednesday but a rainy couple days led to the discovery of a couple leaks in the walls. Probably best to get those sorted before we cover them up and all die of black mold poisoning or whatever.
But I digress! The first Dynamite since Double or Nothing happened, and it was loaded with new and returning talent and an all-time promo. So let’s get to it.
Opening Contest: C.M. Punk and FTR vs Max Caster and the Gunn Club
Dax started off the match against Austin Gunn, and they went back and forth through the first break. Punk came in with a top rope ax handle to the arm of Colton and got a good reaction from the crowd, befitting the new champ.
Punk tried to head to the top rope after a hot tag, only to slip down. After he recovered, he did make it up top and clearly mouthed, “I’m sorry” to the camera and crowd before hitting the Macho Man elbow drop. Punk recovered though, as Billy Gunn tried to distract Punk and Punk replied by hitting Billy with his son mid-powerbomb. Punk nailed Austin with GTS, FTR followed with the Big Rig and the pin.
This wasn’t the cleanest thing ever, but I thought Caster and the Gunns really took advantage of the opportunity to open the show against the champ and the … champs.
Punk grabbed a microphone afterwards and straight up owned his missteps, saying he’s made a lot of mistakes in his career but he’s always learned from them. He also mentioned that he’s never done drugs in his life, but he , “imagines this is what it feels like” as he held up the title. Dax Harwood then strongly implied that he HAS done drugs, and it’s exactly like that before calling out New Japan Pro Wrestling for interfering in the FTR match with Roppongi Vice last week.
Punk then said he knows that the Forbidden Door is coming up and wants to know who his opponent is for that show. THE ACE OF NEW JAPAN, HIROSHI TANAHASHI, ARRIVED!!! I love that guy!
So here’s a relevant little story I’ll drop in because I don’t think I’ve told it before. I went to Wrestlemania 34 in New Orleans with my wife and my buddy. During the show, my wife offered to go get drinks during a match that I was interested in but she wasn’t. While she was in line, a kid walked up to her and asked if they could get a picture with the guy in front of her. She paused and said, “You can…you can ask him yourself” - we think the kid thought she was his translator. They took the pic, and the shorter man with hair like a lion smiled at my wife and did the “shhh” finger to his lips, and they got drinks and dispersed. She recognized the hair and realized who she’d met when she came back to our seats and googled New Japan wrestlers.
And that is my amazing tale. I fear we may be a house divided for Forbidden Door, as she’s been a fan of Tanahashi since then, and I am a lifelong Punk mark. Anyway, back to the show!
MJF then got an entrance and a microphone and…my God. I can’t begin to sum this up; however, writing the whole thing out word for word would be a disservice to what is truly one of the best promos I have ever heard in my life. Max went OFF, threatening to embarrass Tony Khan in front of the visiting WB executives. He talked about how he’s been carrying the roster, how he is expected to hit home runs every week while the rest of the roster coasts. He ran down the fans, referencing how we tweet our useless opinions (guilty) and change those opinions weekly. He went on to lay into management for hoarding their money to spend on ex-WWE talent that “couldn’t lace his boots”. He finished up by screaming into the camera that he wants to be fired and called Tony an “f***ing mark” before his microphone was cut off and they hastily cut to commercial.
Wow. Wow wow wow. Such a passionate speech, just angry and tired and proud and frustrated. I seriously cannot overstate how good this was. If you don’t have time to watch Dynamite this week, or didn’t record it or whatever, just find that segment on YouTube. It is amazing.
So when we returned from the break, we sold the reality of that promo by ignoring it - smooth move, AEW. Our announcers recapped the Tanahashi announcement, and Johnny Elite then made his entrance as we were told Elite had issued an open challenge. A great pre taped video followed, as a silhouette told us that he has healed and will “redeem all the cowboys, the punks, the bastards, and even the pagans.” He wants to take God’s home! It’s Miro!!!
Match #2: Miro vs Johnny Elite
Miro dominated the majority of this, stomping and suplexing Elite. A surprise head kick allowed Johnny to hit a nice standing shooting star press for a two count, but that may have just angered Miro more. A pump kick to the head knocked Elite down, and a very excited Miro locked in Game Over for the submission victory.
A video package recapping Anarchy in the Arena followed, and Chris Jericho and the Jericho Appreciation Society headed to the ring afterward. They discuss their many accomplishments in the Anarchy in the Arena match, with Jericho calling out Eddie Kingston for trying to light him on fire - “who lights a man on fire?!” asked the Wizard. That brought Kingston to the entrance, and he was ready to take them all on when William Regal declared they should have a match…BLOOD. AND. GUTS!
I mean, it’s no WAR GAMES announcement, but it worked.
Eddie headed to the ring to fight valiantly but went down, but Ortiz snuck in from behind and attacked Chris Jericho before cutting a lock of his hair! Jericho flipped out, and agreed to Blood and Guts but wants a hair vs hair match with Ortiz first. I can’t remember the last time I’ve watched one of those - have we ever had one in AEW?
We then watched some video of Samoa Joe being attacked after his match with Adam Cole at Double or Nothing. Jay Lethal, Satnam Singh, and Sonjay Dutt went after Joe’s already injured shoulder with a steel chair. That segued nicely into…
Match #3: ReDragon, Hikule'o, and the Young Bucks vs Jungle Boy, Luchasaurus, Christian Cage, Matt Hardy, and Darby Allin
Adam Cole was on commentary for this match, which featured Hikule'o and Darby Allin subbing in for Cole and Jeff Hardy. Bobby Fish was a punching bag for the good guys at the beginning, taking a little offense from everybody before he kicked Matt Hardy away. The Bucks hit Hardy with a superkick before we headed to the break.
Luchasaurus headed in when we came back, clearing the ring but facing off against the equally impressive Hikule'o. They both attempted chokeslams and ended up lariat-ing one another, which led to Kyle O’Reilly and Darby Allin getting in. They resumed Sunday’s battle and a diving Allin ended up in the caring arms of Hikule'o, who destroyed him outside of the ring. The Bucks finished things by pinning Jungle Boy after a Meltzer Driver, and that was that. A fun big tag match from the company known for fun big tag matches.
A video recap of the tag team championship match from Sunday flowed into a backstage interview with Keith Lee, Swerve Strickland, Lexi Nair, and some famous friends of Swerve. Swerve introduced his friends and got a nice jacket from the designer, and Keith Lee told us that they should be getting those tag straps anytime now. I’m looking forward to that!
Tony Schiavone was then at the entrance and introduced Athena, the newest addition to the women’s division. She seemed very happy to be here, and called out Jade Cargill, saying, “All streaks are made to be broken, and I’m going to break yours!” That summoned Cargill and the Baddies, along with Jade’s new promoter, Stokely Hathaway. Stokely called Jade our Queen, our Goddess, and our TBS Championship, and you won’t get any arguments from me. Keira Hogan then got up in Athena’s face. That brought Kris Statlander and Anna Jay out to back Athena up, and some suits then broke the whole thing up.
Match #4: Wardlow vs JD Drake
Wardlow kept his silent entrance, walking to the ring alone as the camera followed from backstage. Once he got to the stage, his new theme music kicked in. Drake was in the ring already, and once Wardlow joined he thoroughly demolished Drake. A double powerbomb and a pin finished Drake quickly. Squish.
Tony Schiavone hopped into the ring to interview Wardlow and they were interrupted by Smart Mark Sterling and some security fellas. One of those security guys leapt into the ring with Wardlow to serve him some legal documents. Wardlow picked up a microphone to tell the crowd, “This guy doesn’t follow the product,” which made me laugh. Sterling told Wardlow he had been served. Mark is bringing a class action lawsuit against Wardlow on behalf of the Arena Security Union, which I thought was clever and funny. Wardlow responded by powerbombing the security guy and feeding him the papers.
Dan Lambert, Scorpio Sky, and Ethan Page are happy to have moved on from the feud I’d rather not speak of, and on to Dante Martin. They all agreed that Martin has potential, but he’s not at Scorpio Sky’s level yet. Martin interrupted to thank them for their assessments, but he believes he’s better than Sky now, and will prove it in their match.
Match #5: Jamie Hayter and Britt Baker DMD vs Ruby Soho and Toni Storm
Storm was ready to murder Baker but Ruby held her back. So Baker responded by jumping out of the ring and showing off her fancy new Owen Hart Foundation Tournament belt, which I imagine will be a nice accessory for the next few weeks. Storm hit some offense on Britt before tagging Ruby in, which led to Baker getting a little recovery. After the break, a Soho suplex and a hot tag to Storm fizzled as Jamie Hayter hit a hanging DDT on Toni. After some out of ring back and forth, Ruby connected with No Future on Baker, but Britt rolled the pin attempt into Lockjaw. Soho fought out and rolled Baker into a pinning predicament, but Hayter smoothly slid in and flipped the cradle so Ruby was back in the submission. A neckbreaker on Ruby followed, but she hit a quick knee to Britt’s face and finished the match with Destination Unknown. Immediately after, Hayter clocked both Storm and Soho with the Owen belt so Britt could remind us all who runs this division.
Ruby gets a win and Toni got to be there for it as well. Here’s hoping that builds to something for those two!
Main Event: Daniel Garcia vs Jon Moxley
The Wizard Chris Jericho and His Lordship William Regal join commentary for this match between their faction mates. The whole thing was stiff as all get out! Moxley’s stitched forehead opened up after the two traded strikes, so Mox wore a crimson mask throughout the rest of the show.
We returned from break to see Moxley hit Garcia with a throwing suplex onto the steps that will definitely feel bad tomorrow. Some nice offense and counters followed until Jericho couldn’t take any more and headed to the ring. Kingston ran after him, allowing Moxley to execute a Paradigm Shift and a bulldog choke to get the W.
After that intense match, Moxley grabbed a microphone to accept the Blood and Guts match, and American Dad let us know we’re done here.
A great show with some fun matches, the post Double or Nothing episode of Dynamite was really good! I enjoyed every match, and the two hours flew by for me. But if you didn’t get the chance to watch, let’s catch you up with tonight’s Five Good Things:
1- The opening contest was a fun match despite some little missteps. Seeing Punk pair up with FTR was a joy, and Caster and the Gunns held their own in a big spot against some huge competition.
2- That MJF promo is truly can’t miss television. Seek it out, enjoy it, and revel in the fact that this kind of work-shoot stuff isn’t dead yet and there are still guys like Friedman out there to pull it off.
3-The six man tag match was a lot of low stakes fun, and those of us who aren’t super familiar with Hikule'o got to see the big guy show off his power.
4- Wardlow’s squash and the ensuing legal dispute was funny, and I thought Wardlow played his part really well. I don’t really know where we’re going with it, but that’s part of the fun, right?
5- The main event was bloody, brutal, and stiff as hell. I like that the Jericho Appreciation Society and Blackpool Combat Club are going to continue that rivalry, and this match showed that Garcia can stand up to whatever the BCC throws at him.
And that’s it! We have Hell in a Cell Sunday night, so I’ll probably watch SmackDown for the combo pack of Rampage Report/ Side of SmackDown on Saturday. I’ll put together some predictions on Sunday and recap the show on Monday, as per usual. I’m not sure if I’ll be watching NXT In Your House Saturday, but if I get the chance to do so I’ll write about that on Sunday too, or at least I'll mention some highlights in the Hell in a Cell predictions blog!
I appreciate you stopping by, and would love it if you drop your thoughts in the comments section below. You can also follow me on Twitter @ElOsoPequeno, where I try to remember to post whenever I update the blog. I write a Raw Recap on Tuesdays, Dynamite Details on Thursdays, and the Rampage report with a Side of SmackDown highlights on Saturdays. I also plan to write about any other wrestling that I happen to watch. There’s also a weekly wrap up on Fridays, and I’ll do predictions before any big AEW or WWE pay per premium live events.
Have a good one!
No comments:
Post a Comment