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| Image Credit: WWE.com |
Good morning! So AEW Full Gear happened and it was great! Apparently the whole internet is divided about it, but since the whole internet is divided about everything, it’s hard to put too much stock in that. I’m probably more negative until I’ve stewed on things, but once my poor goldfish brain has time to remember storylines and, you know, the past, I remember how nice it is to like things and just move on from the things one can criticize. You want criticism, there’s any number of podcasts and Twitter users who have those takes. I’ll just gloss over stuff that didn’t do it for me, because I’m not everybody and plenty of people like stuff I don’t. I mean, somebody is watching The Bachelor, and it ain’t me.
But I digress! I really enjoyed the show, and despite my concerns about rising costs for us fans, I’m not gonna stop watching AEW PPVs anytime soon, lest I miss a match with the amount of blood they used in Evil Dead 2. My predictions went pretty damn well, too. So let’s crack into our…
AEW Full Gear Recap
Surprise new signing: “Will Ospreay seems like the most obvious choice – he’s been working with the company for years now, and he’s probably comfortable enough to stick around.” Sure, I had Ronda Rousey in there as a backup, but we’re calling this a win.
Devil prediction: Doesn’t matter, we didn’t resolve that one! The internet seems to be leaning towards Jack Perry now, but I’m gonna remain steadfast in my Dr. Britt Baker, DMD guess.
Zero Hour Predictions: Eddie Kingston, Claudio Castignoli, and the team of MJF and Samoa Joe all win. Three for three! The Joe indifference after the retention of the Ring of Honor tag belts is something we’ll get back to for the main event.
Sting, Darby Allin, and Adam Copeland versus Christian Cage, Luchasaurus, and Nick Wayne
“Good guys win, bad guys lose.” And they did! The good guys, non-Copeland division, have already moved apart Avengers-style, with Sting likely preparing for a handful of group matches before his retirement at Revolution. Darby Allin has begun preparations to climb Mount Everest, so his availability is probably a little limited going forth. But Copeland, he and Christian Cage will still have things to discuss after Cage ran away the whole match, and continued to do so Wednesday on Dynamite.
Orange Cassidy © versus Jon Moxley for the AEW International Championship
“...I’d like Cassidy to win, Mox and Orange to shake hands, and Mox to walk away from both the International Championship scene and the Blackpool Combat Club…” So look, it wasn’t exactly what I wanted, but it was enough. Our battered champion retained. As Wheeler Yuta pointed out on Wednesday, it took about a dozen Orange Punches, a Beach Break, and an exposed turnbuckle, but in the end Orange got the job done. Mox didn’t do the handshake thing, but he did move on by entering the Continental Classic tournament, where he defeated the beloved Mark Briscoe in a good Dynamite main event. The BCC remains, though, with Yuta setting up future matches against Shibata, HOOK, basically anybody he can get on camera with.
Hikaru Shida © versus Timeless Toni Storm for the AEW Women’s World Championship
“...Hikaru deserves a long reign with more great matches…I’d prefer that Shida retains here.” Ah, well, can’t be right all the time. I mean, I WOULD still prefer that Shida was champ, instead of feeling like every reign she gets is transitional, but whatever. Storm is super-popular right now, her gimmick is fantastic, and the addition of an understudy that might have given us more than just championship storylines for the women’s division has now become, well, the story of the women’s division. Unless you count the budding romance between Ruby Soho and Cool Hand Ang.
The match itself was great, hard-hitting stuff, and Storm’s creative use of the steel serving plate as butt armor paid off in a knockout Sweet Cheeks Music – a move that looks pretty vicious normally – and a title change.
Ricky Starks and Big Bill © versus La Faccion Ingobernable versus FTR versus Kings of the Black Throne for the AEW World Tag Team Championship in a Ladder Match
“Starks and Bill retain via shenanigans…” Hey, I was right! This match was bonkers, and if you haven’t watched it and have the means, this match and the two that follow are the best parts of the night. There were a ton of brutal and unique spots, but one in particular I’d like to point out was when a ladder was resting on the ropes next to Malakai Black. It's at 2:13 in the video below, although if you didn't get to see the show this whole video is worth a watch:
“...Statlander retains…” No, she doesn’t! Julia Hart is our surprise new champ, starting some kind of spooky alliance with the now metal-AF Skye Blue. No more cheeky baseball cap, Blue wears a crown of blue roses and thorns (I think) and gets some super aggressive entrance music. I think all three of these women have improved dramatically over the last year, with Statlander in particular becoming the bar for match quality. Now that I think about it, I was really only wrong about both women’s matches because I wanted to get more storylines, and having baddies lose but still follow a narrative while faces retain and follow new challenges was really never realistic. We’re only ever gonna get one women’s match and maybe one segment per weekly show.
Hangman Adam Page versus Swerve Strickland in a Texas Death Match
…”Hangman wins, but in such a way as to necessitate a rubber match.” JESUS CHRIST I hope not. These two set out to kill each other and they likely came close. Industrial staplers, 450 splashes onto bottles, barbed wire, chains…this was a match so bloody that Hangman had to stop for a drink and chose to slide under a crawling Swerve and drink his blood before emulating a vampire Triple H and spitting it out. So I was wrong, and I’m sure there’s a third match down the road, but for now Swerve is in the Continental Classic and Hangman is likely regrouping, and hopefully installing better home security and hiring a nanny. Those Ring cameras are probably on sale for Black Friday, buddy.
The Golden Jets versus The Young Bucks
“They cheated to win on Wednesday, and the Young Bucks will cheat again to win on Saturday.” They did cheat to win, but it did not result in a win. It did, however, result in a temper tantrum after the Bucks lost, and a subsequent statement that they’ll be taking some time off – likely to get ready for another fun heel run. So Jericho and Omega are number one contenders to Starks and Big Bill’s AEW tag belts, and the Young Bucks will take a breather before coming back, hopefully revitalized and ready for a run as some of wrestling’s best douchebags (in character, of course).
MJF © versus Switchblade Jay White for the AEW World Championship
“...a clean MJF victory…” Past Oso, it was anything but. This match had online folks screaming about the WWE-ification of their main event, as a night of vignettes built up to a main event that, for a while, looked like it might be a one-legged Adam Cole defending MJF’s title against Switchblade. After the post match attack on Max after his Zero Hour title defense, MJF was driven away in an ambulance and Cole took it upon himself to defend his pal’s title.
Right before the main event, MJF arrived driving what we can assume is a stolen ambulance to fight instead. So after weeks of stealing and defeating the champ, we ended up with a shmozz match in which Jay White couldn’t defeat the proverbial one-legged man in an ass kicking contest. I don’t feel like White is finished – he’s already got a win in the Continental Classic – it sure does look like he’s fine with just moving on. But, it’s wrestling, and smarter people than me have already booked things. I’m just here to watch my stories and enjoy some fights.
So that’s *does math* seven of eleven. That’s not too shabby! And with the Continental Classic tournament already in motion, we should be getting a lot of good wrestling in the coming weeks.
WWE Survivor Series Preview
Speaking of good wrestling coming up…we’ve got Survivor Series this weekend! The WWE’s Thanksgiving tradition continues with a fun-looking card, and I’m gonna preview that, well, now!
WarGames, Men’s Division: The Judgment Day (Dominik Mysterio, JD McDonagh, Finn Balor, Damian Priest) and pal Drew McIntyre versus the RAW SuperFriends (Cody Rhodes, Seth Rollins, Sami Zayn, Jey Uso, and Randy Orton (probably))
WWE is continuing the new version of Survivor Series, in which it’s still technically a Survivor Series match because there’s 4-5 participants per team, except that it’s in a cage, with a set of rules developed when Triple H was running NXT. Oh, and one pinfall wins, it’s not elimination-style.
But these matches have been good-to-great over the last few years, and the teams set for this Saturday night should be able to meet those standards.
With Drew siding with the Judgment Day in his quest for revenge against Jey and, I assume, every other Uso or Reigns or Sikoa, the good guys seem to have their work cut out for them. But this good guy team all but announced Randy Orton at the end of Monday’s Raw. It feels like WWE trying to avoid CM Punk chants – and disappointment when he isn’t there – while still trying to surprise fans with Randy’s return. Orton will get a good pop regardless, and the good guys will get the win, adding more tension to the Judgment Day’s already tenuous relationship.
WarGames, Women’s Division: Damage CTRL expanded edition (Kairi Sane, Asuka, IYO SKY, and Bayley) versus SmackDown SuperGroup (Charlotte Flair, Becky Lynch, Bianca Belair, and Shotzi)
Bayley’s hold on Damage CTRL seems to be slipping by the day, and the addition of Asuka and Kairi Sane have made her seem like the odd woman out, especially after indirectly causing the team loss after loss. I’m not sure where King Kota (Dakota Kai) falls, as she’s more of a mascot because of injury, but Damage CTRL:Oceania doesn’t need Bayley and maybe it’s time for the side-pony and wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube men to return? I’m going with the good guys for this one too, although with a little less confidence – I mean, Damage CTRL could win and still kick Bayley out.
Also, remember when Charlotte dropped her belt when Becky went to grab it during their title exchange after the 2021 Draft? It's at 1:20 here:
Looks like they learned how to get along…although we’ll see how things go. Oh, one more thing – Jade Cargill is still around, and a big multi-person match like this in a ravenous building like the Allstate Arena (it’ll always be the Rosemont Horizon in my heart) would be a perfect time to let her debut…maybe one of the good guys gets jumped in the arena? Xia Li is still wandering around…
Carlito versus Santos Escobar
Escobar really escalated his heel game after his turn on Rey Mysterio and WWE-mandated “Why I Did It” promo afterward. He’s clearly more comfortable in this role, and he’s gonna have a good, short, dominant match against the recently-returned Carlito. Escobar will win, and his former pals will likely get involved, but with Rey out it’s not too difficult to see the LWO just going heel entirely, or maybe Escobar recruiting his own version of the LWO…Wolfpac?
Gunther © versus The Miz for the Intercontinental Championship
It is shocking how easily The Miz has slipped into the good guy role here. A guy who is just hated by online fans and those in attendance, Miz has nonetheless managed to get himself over by using the one thing American wrestling fans will always bite on – jingoism! Good old fashioned USA chants were quickly dismissed by Gunther during Monday’s promo battle, but you can’t deny that Miz can worm his way into your heart every once in a while. Miz is gonna get murdered here, obviously, but I don’t think it goes full squash, especially since I feel like Escobar’s match will take that spot. Miz has enough tenure to talk his way into a respectable underdog match, and while he’s not gonna win any awards for match of the year, Miz might pull off a hope spot that has even the most jaded of us catching our breath, if only for a second.
Or Gunther will just go full Jason Voorhees on that rooftop in part 8. Either way we’re gonna have a good time, right?
Rhea Ripley © versus Zoey Stark for the Women’s World Championship
Zoey got this opportunity after a surprisingly good battle royal a few weeks back. Her intensity and strength should be showcased here against a game opponent in Rhea Ripley, who’s looking for some decent competition lately. Zoey is good in the ring, and equally not as good on the mike, but I like her and really hope she gets better. If only WWE had a developmental brand where performers could practice rather than trying to win viewers over with a lesser product.
*Old man rant incoming* Used to be, NXT was a developmental brand where talent could develop, improving on weaknesses while building up strengths. Now it’s a cartoony “third brand” but only when it’s convenient for WWE to mention it in ratings battles with AEW.
Sorry, that’s like my third digression. This should be the main event, and Rhea will win, but she’ll likely show shock at just how close Starks comes to taking the belt off her. Maybe this is where we will see Jade Cargill make an appearance slash challenge to close the show if my previous prediction doesn’t come to pass. I just want some Jade on my TV, is that too much to ask?
Wrapping Up For the Week
I know I started a template and I fully intend to run with that next weekend, now that we’ve gotten out of this chunk of PPVs…although we’ve got NXT’s DEADLINE coming soon too! Well, you know, work in progress, etc etc. I assure you, a schedule that involves writing for fun (this) and for profit (SlashGear and, hopefully, this in the future) as well as my house cholo duties and maybe some physical activity are all part of my New Year’s resolution. But for now, we’ll focus on a little less sodium, a little more wrestling writing, and working towards some goals. We’ll see you here next week. For now, let’s watch some wrestling!
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