Hell in a Cell Review

  

You know, that Hell in a Cell show was alright! Let’s jump right in with some chat about the contests and how well my predictions went. As the evolution of the blog continues, I’m gonna try to use star ratings and see how that feels. We’ll use a five star system, with no half stars. Fives will be reserved for only the very best matches, and ones will likely never be used because I would feel guilty and I imagine just taking a bump would literally kill me.

Let’s go, as a lengthy video package recaps everything we’re gonna see tonight.

Asuka vs Becky Lynch vs Bianca Belair © for the Raw Women’s Championship

My guess: Bianca Belair beats both Becky n Asuka. (backup guess - Asuka steals the win and Becky and Bianca have a more focused rivalry) - I WAS RIGHT!

This was a great opening contest, and probably my favorite match of the night. The women told a great story, with Becky showing time and again that she was willing to wait outside of the ring and strike when she saw an opportunity. As a result, I thought Asuka and Bianca did a lot of the heavy lifting for the first part of the match, but Becky just kept insisting on not allowing this to be the usual WWE triple threat formula. 

Belair really got to show off her power game, too. She turned armbars into one armed buckle bombs a couple times. Bianca even tried for a Roman Reigns stack pin after she hit a KOD on Asuka and dropped her onto a prone Becky, following with a springboard backflip pin.

Becks kept trying to clear the ring and just toss a damaged opponent back in for an easy pin, but that backfired on her in the end. After Belair hit Asuka with KOD, Becky slid in and tossed Bianca out of the ring. She then hit Asuka with a Manhandle Slam and was immediately thrown out by Belair, who then stole the pin and the win. Belair celebrated by giving cute lil’ aww shucks shoulder shrugs at Becky.

Four stars! I would have liked Asuka to not have to eat the pin, but I guess Becky and Bianca have to keep going for Summerslam? Either way, it was a great match, and somebody was gonna have to get pinned or we would still be watching! Great action, amazing reversals, and a lot of creative ways to use the three person style of match.

Backstage, Cedric Alexander tried to convince MVP and Olmos that the Hurt Business was still viable, and he should play into the match tonight. MVP shut him down, and Olmos told Cedric that it’s time to go. A video package of the MVP, Olmos, and Lashley feud followed with an MVP diss track playing over the highlights.

Bobby Lashley vs MVP and Olmos in a handicap match

My guess: Eh, let’s say…let’s go with Lashley. Yeah. - I WAS RIGHT AGAIN, DESPITE MYSELF!

This took a while to get going, but that’s to be expected. Lashley did a lot of the usual Olmos match stuff here - failing to lift him, having attacks no sold. Eventually Bob realized that if you just punch the guy enough he takes damage, so that’s what he did. Lashley did get put through the corner barricade, as is tradition, and just barely beat the ten count to keep things moving.

Cedric Alexander did get involved after a near fall for Lashley. He hopped onto the apron and was quickly tossed by Olmos, but that distraction allowed Lashley to dump Olmos and apply the Hurt Lock to MVP, who had to submit.

Two stars! This was ok, and I thought the addition of MVP helped keep things moving a little more than the Olmos vs Lashley matches we’ve already done.It had a couple good spots and a feel good finish.

Afterward, another backstage meeting, this one between Cedric and Lashley. In an after school special type moment, Cedric realized he didn’t need to rely on others for his own worth. Bobby was supportive and friendly. Very forgiving considering how often Ced cost him matches recently. But then, Bobby is…the bigger man.

I’m so sorry.

Ezekiel vs Kevin Owens

My guess: Ezekiel, with some Elias shenanigans - WRONG!

My first missed prediction, but I think I can be forgiven. The match itself was fine, with Owens keeping up his manic energy and screaming that he knew Zeke’s true identity. Lots of back and forth action, and a cut over Ezekiel’s eye added some color to the contest. A running knee almost took Owens out, but the attempt to get to the top turnbuckle was misguided. Owens tossed him, stunned him, and got the win.

Three stars! I thought the match was decent, I just don’t understand Owens getting the win. It doesn’t make the story move forward. It doesn’t prove Ezekiel’s identity, as that wasn’t a stipulation. It just gives Owens a victory in the middle of a feud where he should really be losing to show how deep into madness he’s falling!  But tomorrow is another day, another Raw, so I will reserve any more speculation.

Finn Balor, AJ Styles, and Liv Morgan vs The Judgment Day (Edge, Damian Priest, and Rhea Ripley)

My guess: The Judgment Day via Finn-terference (™) - I WAS RIGHT, MOSTLY

I probably should have guessed they would save the new member reveal for Monday, as WWE doesn’t usually do debuts on big shows (Cody being an exception). While we’ve seen versions of this match before, this was the first big faction battle. Rhea Ripley sported some new gear, shiny shorts and a purple one armed top. She tweeted a little later that her actual gear didn’t arrive on time, so she worked with what she had. Hey, at least it matched the rest of the team, which is required by ADAA guidelines. 

The action was good and well paced here, with both teams taking shifts on offense. Morgan and Rhea continue to be great together, as Liv gets plenty of cool spots while Rhea still manages to toss her around and look massive and powerful and like a goddess and…

Sorry, sorry.

Finn made the save, but that turned south quickly, and a hot tag to AJ showed why he’s still considered one of the best. I believe he did get injured after his offensive run, though. He dropped off the far turnbuckle and you could see some concern from the fans as a doctor ran over. Whether the injury was intentional or not, the finish was great, as everybody did some cool stuff and then Balor went for the Coup de Gras on Priest. Rhea did the stand in front thing, so Finn had to wait for Liv to jump on Rhea’s back. That led to Finn missing the finisher and eating a Spear from Edge for his trouble. 1-2-3 and that was it. The bad guys stood tall over a writhing Finn Balor to end things.

Three stars! That was really fun. If they were going to run another Hell in a Cell match, I think this would have been the one for it, as they have run the AJ/Edge rivalry since before Wrestlemania, and the Liv/Rhea and Finn/Priest feuds have gone on a while as well. I would suggest maybe they’re building to that, but I don’t think we do Cell matches outside of this show anymore. Shame. Even though these feuds would have burned out on SmackDown GM Mode, I think the matchups still have some fuel in the tank. I wouldn’t be surprised if AJ and pals move on tomorrow night, but I also could see The Judgment Day using the win to recruit one of the losers and continue the fight.

Madcap Moss vs Happy Corbin in a No Holds Barred match

My guess: Moss wins, but in a competitive match - RIGHT AGAIN!

As a reliable SmackDown follower, but not an avid watcher like I am with Raw, I don’t have a lot invested in this feud. Happy turned on Moss after Moss turned on Happy, in a PG friendly version of the MJF/Wardlow story from the other company. We are then led to believe, after Happy Corbin smashed Madcap Moss’s head in a folding chair, that an ambulance took Moss from an arena, to a medical facility. At that facility, Moss was not only healed, but also given new wrestling gear and, I assume, the therapy needed to develop himself as a person. The medical facility then released him by putting him back into the ambulance and returning him to a different arena where WWE was putting on their next show.

God, I love professional wrestling!

Anyway, the match was good! They didn’t do the thing where they have a blood feud and follow with a lockup in the next match. The fight escalated from strikes to chairs to stairs, and the more intense Moss looked good, overwhelming Corbin for much of the match. He did end up winning by repeating Corbin’s attack on him, putting Happy’s head through a chair and folding it up. Corbs left on a stretcher, and Moss left victorious. Now if we can do something about that name…

Two stars! A decent WWE style hardcore match, with lots of weapons but not a ton of brutality or blood. Still, it got the message across that Moss is not to be trifled with in his new, less madcap role.

Mustafa Ali vs Theory © for the United States Championship

My guess: Theory retains - I MEAN COME ON IT WAS IN ALI’S HOMETOWN

Ali got a nice entrance that highlighted that he’s from Chicago, just a half hour ride on the Blue Line from Rosemont, where the Allstate Arena is located. Some cool Bulls themed gear with the beautiful Chicago flag on one leg told us two things - Ali probably doesn’t like thin crust pizza, and he probably wasn’t going to win this match. WWE hates hometown winners as much as I hate candy corn.

I know Theory has a pedigree as a good wrestler, but I haven’t really seen it in the WWE matches he’s been in. If you know any matches where he’s shown up and shown out please, let me know! He was ok here, but I thought Ali was really allowed to display his talents in this match. Lots of fun DDTs and rolling an A-Town Down attempt into an STF was a unique way out of that finisher. To be fair to Theory, he did have a cool spot that was like a seated on the top rope Spanish fly, that he seamlessly transitioned into full mount punches. It was good!

Ali had Theory lined up for his 450 splash, but Theory was able to dodge that. A Town Down and three seconds later, the villain is taking selfies with a knocked out Ali.

Three stars! Despite my saltiness when a guy I like keeps losing, this was a good matchup. Theory is talented and easily unlikable. Ali deserves more than a punishment storyline, but sometimes that’s how this company is run. 

A video recaps the months and the matches leading to Rhodes Rollins 3.

Cody Rhodes vs Seth Rollins in a Hell in a Cell match

My guess: Cody goes three for three on Rollins, has his hand raised and is a bloody mess - I WAS RIGHT BECAUSE INTERNAL BLEEDING IS STILL BLEEDING

Boy, this was a tough watch. Rollins came out first, in a coat he dropped to reveal Dusty Rhodes themed polka dot tights and a shirt. Cody got his grand entrance but you could tell he wasn’t a hundred percent. His right hand was heavily taped and he didn’t have the usual intensity when he sang along with his music and greeted the sold out crowd.

Then he dropped his ring jacket.

The reports WWE gave during the match did not prepare me for that. They said that Cody suffered a partial tear of his right pectoral muscle earlier in the week, and during a pre match workout he managed to tear the whole pec off the bone.

Please refer to the header image and be horrified.

To decide you need to keep this match on the card is mortifying to me. Cody wasn’t going to say no because of course he wasn’t, that’s not how the Rhodes family is wired. But you’d think WWE officials or medical professionals would say something along the lines of “your right side appears to be a corpse at this point and we would like you to not traumatize small children and adult blog writers.”

Reader, they did not say these things, and I cringe-watched this match. FOR YOU. I was convinced that arm was just gonna pop off at several points. Cody leaned in to heavy strikes with his left hand, and he worked around the injury as best he could. Rollins did exactly what he should have as the diabolical heel, shoving kendo sticks into the bruised areas and going after the right arm as well. Tables got involved, as both men were sent through one each before they switched tactics. 

Cody introduced a bull rope with cowbells into the match after Rollins beat him with his weight belt a few times. Cody and Seth attached the rope to their wrists and proceeded to do violence to one another.

Rhodes hit several Cross Rhodes but none of them stuck. After a time, Seth found a sledgehammer and tried to invoke the spirit of Triple H, running at Cody with the thing. Cody kicked Rollins in the gut. Both men went for a Pedigree, with Cody eventually landing the move after both guys were able to reverse out of previous attempts. Rollins did escape that, and Rhodes gave chase, looking like Leatherface as he stalked his prey while practically dragging the sledge. That led to Seth sliding back into the ring, and hitting Cody with a curb stomp when he tried to follow. That still didn’t get a three count! Cody eventually recoved and was able to land two consecutive Cross Rhodeses, followed by actually murdering Seth with a sledgehammer to the face and the pinfalll.

Four stars! The amount of pain Cody went through delivering that match must have been insane. I’m sure he wanted to run it, not just for the setting or the fans, but because he really wanted to finish that storyline. The pedigrees have been a running thing throughout the rivalry, as both Rhodes and Rollins tried it a few times to little success. Using the sledge was a great shout out to Triple H as well. It was legitimately hard to watch, but it was also two guys in a cage doing amazing things for our entertainment.

I’m looking forward to Raw tonight! I imagine Cody will come out to tell us how long he’ll be out, and it will be interesting to see what direction WWE goes in after another top superstar is out of action. This was definitely another one of those “filler” type WWE shows that ended up surpassing my expectations. Here are Five Good Things about it!

1- The opening contest was amazing, and everything you would expect from Bianca Belair, Asuka, and Becky Lynch. They knew what story they wanted to tell and built an incredible match around Becky’s devious nature and the straightforward competitiveness of both Asuka and Belair.

2- KO and Ezekiel had a good, solid outing even though I didn’t agree with the finish.

3- The six person tag match between Nu Bullet Club and The Judgment Day was a well done contest, with everybody getting a chance to shine and display the chemistry that has been evident in all the various matchups that led up to this. Woulda been pretty cool in a cage, though!

4- Ali and Theory had a respectable match for the US title even though Ali was a longshot to win at best. They did a lot with a little and I thought they both came out looking better at the end.

5 - That main event was both terrible to watch and amazing to behold. Seeing someone just choose to ignore an injury is an amazing testament to his dedication and, at the same time, an indictment of the general assumption that you have to work hurt, and the show must go on. 

The match was as good a Hell In A Cell match as you could hope for from these two, considering what they were working around. I think I have way more to say about that than a little blurb at the end of a column, so I’ll move on.

And that’s it! We’ve got Raw tonight, so we’ll see if any of these storylines continue and who gets shoved into new ones. I’ll have the full Raw Review tomorrow. Have a great Monday!

I appreciate you stopping by, and would love it if you drop your thoughts in the comments section below. You can also follow me on Twitter @ElOsoPequeno, where I try to remember to post whenever I update the blog. I recap Raw, Dynamite, and Rampage weekly, and also write about anything else I happen to watch. There’s a weekly wrap up on Fridays, and I’ll do predictions before any big AEW or WWE pay per premium live events. 

Have a Good One!