Raw Review for 6/6/2022

 

It’s Tuesday morning, the sun has risen, the animals have been fed, and it’s time to write about Monday Night Raw. Not for you, dear reader. You just keep picking up what I’m putting down and we’re in business. I actually received approval to submit articles to a site that pays per thousand views, so I’ll definitely link to that if I get anything published. Remember, this is as much our journey as it is mine. And the faster we expand, the less likely I am to give up and return to the business that turned my shoulder into a sack of rancid crab meat and gravel.

Mrs. Pequeno loves that analogy.

Anyway, we got three hours of wrestling to cover and quite a lot of fallout from the decent Hell in a Cell show from Sunday! Let’s get to it!

We, obviously, started the show recapping the last match from Hell in a Cell, as Cody Rhodes dramatically defeated Seth Rolling despite his horrific injury. I’ve heard people say it probably doesn’t hurt that bad! It certainly looked bad and I wouldn’t work through it. I wouldn’t work through a sore shoulder either, so maybe I’m not the metric for toughness.

Cody entered the ring to a round of cheers and thank you chants. He thanked us for our nice tweets and said it was a privilege to perform. He didn’t want this injury to lead to sadness or melancholy. He wanted to show his little girl, when she’s old enough, that he was able to stand up and fight through the injury. He won’t let it demoralize him!

He told us he is done with Seth Rollins and wanted to talk about the Money in the Bank cases that hung above the ring. Cody believes that, in four weeks, he’ll be able to compete, and win that contract, and defeat Roman Reigns to become undisputed WWE champion.

That brought Seth out of the back and (slowly) into the ring. Seth told Cody he still doesn’t like him. After what Cody put himself through, though, he’s earned Seth’s respect. He told a nearly weeping Cody that Dusty is very proud of his baby boy. They shook hands and Rollins headed backstage. 

Cody left the ring, smiling and shaking hands. He made it to the entrance stage when Rollins ran out with a sledge hammer, conking Rhodes in the back of the head. Seth proceeded to tear Cody’s shirt off and stomp on his injured shoulder/ pec/ body. Officials came out to circle and point, but didn’t accomplish much. A commercial break followed, but on our return Cody was still laid out. Rhodes refused a stretcher and walked himself back. We recapped the beating and moved on.

Opening Contest: Becky Lynch vs Dana Brooke

Becky started out by beating Dana up a bit, but they were quickly interrupted by the 24/7 squad running out from backstage. Tozawa ran into the ring, and Dana seized the opportunity by rolling him up for a pinfall victory and the title. Technically, that meant Lynch and Dana ended in a DQ, but Becky grabbed a microphone and insisted that she is the only one who would leave her title matches with a title from now on. She wanted Dana to defend the 24/7 championship, and threatened to smash the face of anyone who dared interfere.

I can’t star rate that, it’s barely a match!

Match #2 (technically): Becky Lynch vs Dana Brooke © for the 24/7 Championship

Hm, never thought I’d type that sentence. Anyways, Becky again took control early on, getting the champ on the ground and loudly congratulating her between kicks to the stomach. Asuka’s music hit, and the former champ headed toward the ring. Becky hit Brooke with a Becksploder, but got distracted, resulting in a Dana Brooke rollup for two. Brooke got some nice offense in, and went for a moonsault but missed. Becky followed up with a big boot, but Dana was able to eat that and counter with a suplex. Becky’s leg was held down by Asuka to prevent a kick out, and Dana successfully defended the 24/7 title she just won.

It was silly and dumb but at least Dana wasn’t made to look like a complete chump, and Becky and Asuka get some heat on their rivalry. Too short to rate, though.

A John Cena video played next, informing us that the Doctor of Thuganomics will be returning on June 27 to celebrate his twenty years in the business. And, per my friend Adam, to begin his SummerSlam rivalry with Theory.

The Miz and Maryse headed out for some MizTV. They love each other, but not in the sloppy Guevara/Conti kind of way so it’s fine. They also love Money in the Back, which Miz informed us he will win for a record breaking third time this year! Maryse then started to speak ill of Green Bay (GOOD) and Riddle came out for his interview. He politely introduced himself to Maryse, saying, “Bonjour! Omelet du fromage. Me llamo Riddle!” Perfect. 

Riddle then gave a quick shoutout to Randy Orton, and said, “I hope you come back soon…unlike my stepdad.” Poor Riddle! Miz then ran down Orton, switching silly Riddle to serious, angry Riddle. Riddle then said he was tired of fighting Roman’s underlings (there’s your minimum one Reigns Reference per show) and wants to fight the Tribal Piece of Trash for the undisputed title. 

That smoothly segued into Riddle saying there’s a reason Cena is playing Peacemaker while Miz is playing homemaker - Miz has tiny balls. The crowd chanted tiny balls, and Maryse defended Miz by saying he has perfectly adequate balls. Miz said that wasn’t enough, so she escalated to above average, huge, biggest in the world. Riddle yelled, “Prove it!’ and Maryse suggested Miz and Riddle have a match. Riddle accepted, Miz declined because he was in a tuxedo. Then Ciampa attacked Riddle from behind! Miz then accepted the match over a laid out Riddle and we went to commercial.

Match #3: Miz (w/Maryse) vs Riddle

Riddle had plenty of time to recover during the break. He attacked at the bell, quickly hitting a hanging DDT but barely missing a follow up RKO as Miz slid out of the ring. He jumped on the apron and Riddle tore his pants, I guess so we could see his tiny balls? Miz was able to grab Maryse’s purse, and commentary reminded us that Maryse keeps bricks in that thing. Miz went to attack Riddle, but that was a swing and a miss. Riddle hit the RKO and got the pinfall win.

Another short, kinda unrateable, match. This one did start a rivalry, so our 2K22 GM mode plans are going perfectly.

A short video recap of NXT 2.0 In Your House was next. I did not watch, did you? Any recommendations for matches to check out? 

Match  #4: Street Profits vs Usos, Championship Contenders Match

To be clear, Becky Lynch called out how stupid the premise of these matches are on this very show. 

Dawkins went aggressive to start, knocking Jey off the apron and trying two surprise pins right off the bat. Things slowed significantly from there, as Ford was tagged in but the Usos responded to any offense by going outside the ring to regroup. 

After the first commercial break, Byron literally said, “If the Street Profits can defeat the Usos, you gotta believe they will be next in line for a championship opportunity.” Yes, Byron, that is literally the premise of this match. This is what I listen to, every week, for YOU. I BEAR THIS BURDEN FOR YOU, DEAR READER!

Things picked up though, and the Usos took control before our second commercial break. Ford hit a frog splash -  he got high enough to nearly headbutt the Money in the Bank cases. That only got two. It led to both Ford and Jey outside the ring, and Jey whipped Ford into the corner barricade. A missed followup boot sent Jey over the barricade, and Montez was alert enough to beat the ten count and get the victory for the Profits. Their prize? They get to fight the Usos for their undisputed titles. Because they are now contenders!

Three stars! Am I grading on a curve because this was the first legit match of the night? WHO’S TO SAY? These teams always put on a good show. I think the combination of the slow start and the pair of commercial interruptions kinda killed the flow, but it was still a good time.

We reviewed the tape and…yes, Cody Rhodes was indeed attacked at the beginning of tonight’s show. 

Bobby Lashley was in the ring, and very pleased to be done with MVP and Olmos. Theory then interrupted him, claiming Lashley only won with help and asking why Bob was in HIS ring. After a bicep measuring contest (Bob is, once again, the bigger man) Bobby decided that he wants the United States Championship. Theory said Bob doesn’t deserve it, because while Lashley has defeated Brock Lesnar and Randy Orton, he’s never beaten Theory. Theory ran away to end the segment.

A video package and short promo reminded the audience and Veer does not like Dominik Mysterio and has murdered him in the past. Veer’s gonna crush Dom like a fly while Rey watches.

Match #5: Veer vs Dominik Mysterio (w/Rey)

This was actually pretty good for Veer and Dom! Veer looked to bust out some power, but Dominik was able to evade most of his attacks early on. Dominick, while not in control, did manage to hit some light offense before a pounce by Veer shut him down. Veer took over from there, tossing Dom in and out of the ring until a missed shoulder block in the corner. That left Veer vulnerable to a corner 619 by Dominick, sending Veer’s noggin into the ringpost. Mysterio went for a frog splash to finish, but Veer dodged and nearly decapitated Dom with a lariat. Veer prepped the Cervical Clutch, but a fearful Rey attacked Veer for the DQ finish. The Mysterios finished Veer off and left…heroically?

Three stars! This was good! It showed Dom growing against a much more powerful opponent. It kept Veer looking monstrous and strong. It allowed Rey to play the role of concerned dad, one that may end up biting him in the ass as his son’s skills develop. I dug it!

Hey, it’s the Judgment Day! The Cody Countdown was used this week to tease the induction of a new member of everybody’s favorite goth kids and their friend who graduated but still hangs out in the parking lot with them. Rhea told us that their message has spread, and control is an illusion. Priest said it’s Rhea’s destiny to win the Women’s Championship. Aww, this group is so supportive of one another!

Edge spoke next, first telling the fans to be quiet when an adult is talking. He praised the growth Rhea and Priest have experienced under his learning tree. He said someone else was hearing their message, and introduced the newest member of The Judgment Day…

FINN BALOR!

Finn headed out, all smiles. He shook Edge’s hand, and Edge told him he saw a change in Finn during their match last night. Finn thanked him, and said joining the faction, “wasn’t a choice, it was a calling.” Finn went on to praise Rhea and Priest some more, and he reached out to them after their match and discussed things.

Priest then told Edge he’s great, and it was easy to follow him on this journey. Edge taught them to get rid of any limitation holding them back (this is the part where Mrs. Pequeño called it) and they were ready to shed the last thing holding them back.

Priest then nailed Edge with a clothesline, and the mutiny was on! Ripley, Priest, and Balor stomped edge, then Damien hit a chokeslam and Finn followed with Coup de Gras. They continued the beating outside the ring, and Priest hit a fine looking Razor’s Edge onto the announce table. They tossed Edge back in the ring, grabbed chairs, and choked Edge with a broken piece of chair as Rhea held officials out of the ring with a chair. Priest finished things with a one man con-chair-to to end Edge and the segment.

Match #6: Olmos vs Cedric Alexander

Well, Cedric hit like two punches. Then the two handed chokeslam by Olmos killed Cedric dead. No rating, no stars, only a squish noise.

Afterward, Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode returned to meet Kevin Patrick on the little interview stage. They’re very excited to be back, and then were very interrupted by MVP, who berates the duo for interrupting Olmos’s victory celebration. A superkick shuts MVP up and the Dirty Dawgz hightailed it.

Match #7: Ezekiel vs Otis (w/Chad Gable)

Zeke is on fire out of the gate, hitting Otis with forearm after forearm. Otis got some shots in to slow things, but Ezekiel was back on offense in no time. He hit a quick series of strikes and a sharp looking knee, and the rollup pin ended things quickly.

Too short for stars, but the point was to get Ezekiel back on the winning side of things so…mission accomplished!

Ezekiel grabbed a microphone and called out Kevin Owens, requesting a rematch because he was just “too Zeked up” for their match at Hell in a Cell. Owens accepted…IF Ezekiel admitted he is Elias. Ezekiel says it, and Owens accepts the rematch. Zeke told Owens he actually used a page from the Kevin Owens playbook…HE LIED!

Bianca Belair headed out to watch the fatal four way main event, the winner of which will face her at Money in the Back. There’s something so wholesome about little white boys in Green Bay dancing to Belair’s entrance music. I love it!

Main Event: Doudrop (w/ Nikki A.S.H.) vs Alexa Bliss (w/Lily) vs Liv Morgan vs Rhea Ripley

I do not understand why Bianca is never given a microphone when she’s in this position. Is she not comfortable speaking during matches? Does Vince not trust her? We know she’s amazing in promos. I just don’t get it.

This was, unquestionably, the match of the night. The action was paced well and everyone involved looked great. I would suggest just watching the thing, and not just because I didn’t take great notes! The match started with the usual pairings of opponents while the other two women waited, but quickly evolved into a series of moves and tags and flow. The eventual winner of the match was Rhea Ripley, who hit Doudrop with Riptide for the pinfall win. She stared Bianca down to end the show as Finn and Damien joined her in the ring.

Four stars! A good main event and a good fatal four way! The pairings kept changing and kept me interested enough to get lax on the notes (sorry) and the finish, while I kinda expected it, was still good. Bianca and Ripley should be able to have a lot of fun building to their match at Money in the Bank, and I’m looking forward to all of it.

That was a shaky Raw, but the kind of shaky where they commit to starting new stories rather than putting on good matches. That being said, here’s our Five Good Things!

1- Cody’s passionate opening speech was great. The man exudes a love for the business, and his heart was on his sleeve for this one. I didn’t think they needed the Seth attack afterward, but I guess that will make Cody’s return sweeter whenever he recovers.

2- Riddle, Miz, and Maryse had some fun with their MizTV segment. You don’t often get a French lesson on your Monday Night Raw, so I approve

3- Street Profits and Usos was one of the better matches on the card tonight, if not one of their best. It was still fun, especially the last segment, so it’s worth a watch.

4- Finn Balor taking over THE Judgment Day was an interesting turn, and one I did not see coming! I was hoping he would be the addition to the squad, but having him run the show was a fascinating development. Here’s hoping this drives Edge to team with AJ and Liv, and Finn to go full DEMON for their next outing.

5- The main event was genuinely good and a fine fatal four way. Every woman looked good in that match, even Nikki and Lily, and the outcome was a fine setup to what should be a great match between Bianca Belair and Rhea Ripley.

And that’s it! I have a lot more I’d like to discuss regarding Cody’s injury and his need to work through it, as someone who has both chosen to do that and been told to. I think I’ll write about that this week, so look for a Tweet when that’s up.

I appreciate you stopping by, and would love it if you drop your thoughts in the comments section below. You can also follow me on Twitter @ElOsoPequeno, where I try to remember to post whenever I update the blog. I recap Raw, Dynamite, and Rampage weekly, and also write about anything else I happen to watch. There’s a weekly wrap up on Fridays, and I’ll do predictions before any big AEW or WWE pay per premium live events. 

Have a Good One!

Hell in a Cell Predictions!

  

Hey, happy Sunday! It's another pay per premium live event weekend! We've got Hell in a Cell tonight, so I wanted to put up some predictions. There are seven announced matches for the show, but only one will actually *Vince voice* take place inside the demonic structure known as HELL...IN A CELL!!! *coughs, wheezes*

Enough of that silliness. Let's get into the serious business of guessing who will win in our favorite predetermined sport!

Madcap Moss vs Happy Corbin in a No Holds Barred match

This was just added on SmackDown to mark Madcap Moss’s return from the medical facility. I assume he was there the entire time he’s been off TV because on the show, an ambulance returned him to a different arena than the one he was taken from weeks ago?

But I digress. Moss, due for a name change now, has a more serious edge. He has black trunks and no suspenders! He will absolutely win, but I think the rivalry creeps on a while longer.

My guess: Moss wins, but in a competitive match

Finn Balor, AJ Styles, and Liv Morgan vs The Judgment Day (Edge, Damian Priest, and Rhea Ripley)

This feud has been running since before Wrestlemania in one form or another, and now has blossomed into a good old faction battle. I really like Team Nu Bullet Club! Good to see Finn involved in a storyline, and I adore Liv’s acting in and out of the ring. Speaking of which, did you see she's gonna be in a horror movie? Good for her, I had heard she’s big into scary movies and I’m glad she’s out here living her best life.

As for THE Judgment Day, they’re still rolling along. I don’t hate it by any stretch, it just has felt like they’re going through the motions the last couple weeks getting to this point. But we ARE at this point, so I think we get that fourth member Edge keeps alluding to. I had many, many guesses before, but now that Ciampa is involved with the Ali/ Theory storyline, I think I’ve settled on someone turning on the good guys tonight, maybe Finn. I think the match itself will be fun; they’ve done well in their previous outings. It feels to me like the bads take it here and continue to grow The Judgment Day

My guess: The Judgment Day via Finn-terference (™)

Ezekiel vs Kevin Owens

I’ve really enjoyed this stupid, stupid story! Owens, as I’ve said before, is a gift for WWE and they are lucky to have him. I can’t think of too many other guys who could take this material and make it work for as long as KO has. Ezekiel and the Alpha Academy have played their parts well too, making for a good time every week.

I think Ezekiel wins and maybe moves on to something else, but not before messing with Owens some more. I imagine a distraction finish, either via Elias guitar riff or something on the Titantron or a body double. Then Ezekiel finds another rival and Kevin Owens starts a series of vignettes where he’s in a mental health facility or something.

My guess: Ezekiel, with some Elias shenanigans

Bobby Lashley vs MVP and Olmos in a handicap match

This one is probably the first match I’m a little conflicted on. I don’t love this whole story and it does feel like they’ve stretched it far longer than is necessary, but I also wouldn’t know what else to do with these guys. WWE likes to keep Lashley strong so he’s a constant threat to take any championship when they need a filler feud between big shows. WWE also loves a giant, and they’ll want to keep Olmos looking strong. 

There’s also the issue of Cedric Alexander. He’s been getting involved in this rivalry for weeks, and I’m sure he’ll come into play here as well. Can Bob overcome three on one odds, or is that too much even for him?

I think the move is to keep Lashley looking strong by having him pin MVP, who is really the source of all his problems lately anyway. Olmos is the muscle but it’s not like he’s going after Bob - it’s all MVP feeling slighted and wanting revenge. 

That being said, I also believe WWE values Olmos more than Bobby, and I don’t know where any of these guys go after this thing wraps up! I’m very conflicted considering I’m not terribly interested in this whole story.

My guess: Eh, let’s say…let’s go with Lashley. Yeah.

Mustafa Ali vs Theory © for the United States Championship

Theory has only had the US championship a few weeks, and I don’t think he’s defended it outside of Monday’s match against a beat up Ali. He’s also the storyline protégé of one Vince McMahon, AND he’s going up against a guy who dared to ask to be released when he wasn’t being used. I would love to be wrong here because I really like Ali, but I’m also realistic. 

I do think they’ll put on a good match, but it won’t go too long or anything. It’s had a decent build, and The Miz and Ciampa are both kinda involved in the story so they might be tapped to help the champ keep his strap. One way or another, Theory will keep the championship.

My guess: Theory retains

Asuka vs Becky Lynch vs Bianca Belair © for the Raw Women’s Championship

As far as “replacement matches” for the whole Sasha and Naomi thing, this triple threat is fantastic. Becky has been leaning into the funnier side of her heel persona, and Asuka has had some silly stuff with her BAYBAY insults to Lynch. Oddly, the least involved person in this feud is the one currently holding the gold: Bianca Belair.

On paper, the match will be amazing and the champ retains. Given the current women’s division in the WWE, and the upcoming tag team tournament (disclaimer: they didn’t mention the tag straps on either show last week and they may just drop the whole thing) maybe they decide they need to shake things up here.

Any one of these three could go on to have a nice title run, but Belair has only held the championship since ‘Mania. I think people, WWE included, put a lot of focus on title reign length as a show of faith in the champ. Taking the belt off her, especially since her last run ended with a returning Lynch stealing the belt in less than a minute, would certainly be a bad look. 

I am going to be boring and go with the thing that makes sense, but I’ll be pleasantly surprised if they switch it up.

My guess: Bianca Belair beats both Becky n Asuka. (backup guess - Asuka steals the win and Becky and Bianca have a more focused rivalry)

Cody Rhodes vs Seth Rollins in a Hell in a Cell match

Speaking of rivalries that have gone on for a while! This will be Seth and Cody’s third match in as many pay per premium live events, after a great surprise return at Wrestlemania for Cody and a fantastic second match where Rollins really seemed to have Rhodes’s number at every turn.

This is one of the few times a feud has happened to organically come to a head at the same time as a fitting themed show has come up on the calendar. Rollins has escalated things to the point where a Hell in a Cell match just feels right. While I do miss using the Cell specifically for these out of control style battles, I think this whole thing has been timed really well. 

As for the match, I think Cody goes over once again. His only other action, aside from the standard WWE everybody-talks-and-gets-put-in-a-big-tag-match, has been a sloppy short match with the Miz that Rollins interfered in. I think Rhodes has to move forward, especially with Money in the Bank coming up. Cody feels like an obvious front runner to challenge Roman Reigns for the championships sooner rather than later. I also imagine Cody is very excited to get a little messy here; maybe he "accidentally on purpose" gets the crimson mask he relied on in AEW a bit too often.

My guess: Cody goes three for three on Rollins, has his hand raised and is a bloody mess

That’s it! I hope you have fun watching, and maybe drop a line or shoot a tweet with your predictions! I’ll be back here tomorrow with a recap of the show and maybe some leftover hot wings. No promises though. 

I appreciate you stopping by, and would love it if you drop your thoughts in the comments section below. You can also follow me on Twitter @ElOsoPequeno, where I try to remember to post whenever I update the blog. I recap Raw, Dynamite, and Rampage weekly, and recap anything else I happen to watch. There’s also a weekly wrap up on Fridays, and I’ll do predictions before any big AEW or WWE pay per premium live events. 

Have a Good One!

WWE Raw Recap for 5/30/2022

 

Hey hey, it’s Tuesday! Time to get into some Monday Night Raw, the go home edition for Sunday’s WWE Hell In A Cell pay per premium live event! So far we’ve got one match that actually will take place in the Cell; will they add more tonight?

Becky Lynch was out to welcome us to the big time, and to Monday Night Raw. She tells us that she runs on spite and coffee (I hear ya, sister) and doesn’t need us for her to win the women’s championship on Sunday. She then talks about the monster she created by giving Asuka the title WHEN SHE LEFT TO CREATE LIFE LIKE THE GOD SHE IS. Becky was on FIRE for her first Raw hosting duty in a while! 

Asuka came out to defend herself. Bianca Belair then came out to defend herself from both of them, and to remind Asuka that she hasn’t forgotten getting kicked in the head last week. From there, we moved into our…

Opening Contest: Bianca Belair vs Asuka

Becky stayed out for commentary, and she dropped Chris Jericho’s “I’m a wizard” line before switching to “I’m a magician, I made Bianca’s title disappear in 28 seconds.” It was some good stuff! 

The match was good too, with Bianca showing off her strength and also hitting that taunt button a lot. Asuka played the role of wily veteran well, dodging and countering attacks before tweaking her knee while escaping the KOD. The inevitable distraction from Becky indirectly led to a victory for Belair, as Asuka’s magistral cradle was rolled through into a pinfall. 

Becky immediately ran in after the bell, tossed Bianca out of the ring, and attacked Asuka’s leg to end the segment. I thought this was a good WWE style opening match, adding some heat to the feud before we get to the triple threat at Hell In A Cell. I was also surprised there was a clean win, especially with Lynch at the commentary table!

A video package rehashing Kevin Owens’s rivalry with Ezekiel leads us into our next match.

Match #2: The Mysterios and Ezekiel vs Alpha Academy and Kevin Owens

This match was a blast! The Mysterios seemed to be putting their all into making this a fun watch, and I thought it paid off. There was a great sequence where Dominik tossed Rey into a dropkick on Otis, followed by Ezekiel tossing Dom, followed by both Mysterios hitting dropkicks to bring the big man down. 

Rey flipped out of an Owens pop up powerbomb, but missed the follow up 619. That led to a double 619 from Dom and Rey, and a stalling spinning brainbuster to finish the match with Ezekiel pinning Owens.

Owens was very displeased after the match, screaming at commentary and destroying their booth.

A recap of the Rhodes vs Miz match, and of Rollins’s subsequent attack on Cody, followed.

Cody was out next, in a nice suit but with full pyro. He spoke about how much he still respects Rollins, and mentioned that his father called Seth a generational talent.

Rollins headed out from a crowd entrance, cackling and telling Cody that he doesn’t like him, and doesn’t want him in WWE. “You don’t get to break the throne and then come back to claim it,” was a great line. 

Cody challenged Seth then and there, and Seth headed to the ring but stopped at the barricade to say he’d see Cody Sunday. Rhodes disagreed and ran Seth down, and a good old fashioned punch fight in the crowd ensued. Cody put Seth through the corner barricade before security pulled them apart. 

The two would break away from the officials a couple times to resume their punching, before we eventually went to commercial.

We then got a video recap of the thing we literally saw before the commercial, but I can’t stay mad because Alexa Bliss headed to the ring next. A recap of her winning the 2018 Money in the Bank briefcase, and then cashing in on Nia Jax to win her fifth championship.

Match #3: Alexa Bliss vs Doudrop (w/Nikki A.S.H.)

A countdown clock for tonight’s Championship Contenders’ Match between the Usos and Riddle and Nakamura popped up as the match began, so I guess that takes the Cody Countdown’s spot tonight. Doudrop controlled early, using the match as a teachable moment for Nikki. Doudrop went for a top rope body drop, which Bliss avoided. Nikki tried to knock Alexa off the turnbuckle and ate a boot for her efforts. Twisted Bliss and a three count got Alexa another notch in the victory column.

A video segment recapped Olmos and Lashley’s past matches, and led into MVP announcing that the stipulation for Lashley’s match at Hell in a Cell will be a handicap match against Olmos and MVP.

Miz came out to host some Miz TV next, and he began to plug his USA show Miz and Mrs. when the Street Profits interrupted him. They proceeded to really sell the card for Hell in a Cell on Sunday, and then used some Rock quotes against an unsuspecting Miz. 

The 24/7 belt competitors ran into the ring to interrupt this interruption, and the chaos led to Tamina slamming Dana Brooks and winning the 24/7 championship!

To celebrate, Tamina grabbed Akira Tozawa and kissed him. Didn’t she just have Truth serve him divorce papers last week? Anyway, that led to Tozawa hitting Tamina with a surprise rollup, and winning the 24/7 championship from her. I will admit, I laughed a few times at this whole mess.

We went to a recap of Ali getting murdered by Veer. 

Match #4: Mustafa Ali vs Ciampa, if Ali wins he gets a US Championship match

Theory was on commentary for this match. It was a good, if short match! I just found it hard to enjoy when the commentary was so focused on rehashing the story between Ali and Theory, rather than even making a passing mention of the action in front of them. It ended as one may have guessed, with Theory interfering for Ali to win via disqualification.

Theory then challenged Ali to the US championship match RIGHT NOW, and Ali did what every stupid face does in wrestling and agreed to it. 

Match #5: Mustafa Ali vs Theory © for the United States Championship

Ali was barely alive at the beginning of the match, and Theory gloated while slapping him around. A surprise tornado DDT woke Theory up, and he finished Ali with his A-Town Down. 

Adam Pearce was at the entrance, and announced that Mr. McMahon liked Theory’s plan but wanted to see a fair fight. The rematch was set for Sunday’s Hell in a Cell.

Shinsuke Nakamura and Riddle talked to the camera backstage, comparing themselves to a couple of ronin walking the road. So the Ronin and the Bro-nin (I love it) versus the Usos is coming up next.

Match #6: The Ronin and the Bro-nin vs The Usos, Championship Qualifier

I’m surprised this wasn’t the main event! A good match, with Nakamura adding a new wrinkle to the expected spots. Riddle gained the upper hand and started going full Orton, hitting draping DDTs and even an avalanche RKO. A couple powerslams and setup for another DDT, but then  Riddle got bonked in the head with his scooter for the DQ victory. 

The good guys recovered and stood in the ring to end the segment.

This next match had a WILD series of booking decisions before it. We had Liv Morgan’s entrance, a promo by Mustafa Ali, a rundown of the Hell in a Cell card, Rhea Ripley’s entrance, a commercial break, and a Memorial Day video before…

Match #7: Rhea Ripley (w/ Damien Priest) vs Liv Morgan (w/ AJ Styles)

It was a decent match, although mostly a retread of things we’ve seen before from these two. Rhea pounded on the smaller Liv, but Liv eked out some offense and was about to hit her finisher when Damian Priest held the ropes (which Edge did last week) to prevent the move. AJ then sprinted to attack Damian, and Rhea was stared down AJ and went to, I assume, murder Liv Morgan. Liv countered into a backstabber and got the 3 count!

The Judgment Day went for some revenge, as Priest took out Styles and stalked Morgan. Finn Balor then sprinted to the ring, and he and Styles hit the Coup de Gras and Phenomenal Forearm on Priest. Ripley then stood against the guys, who smirked as she turned away and ate a top rope dropkick from Liv, allowing our heroes to celebrate over the corpses of their enemies with a “Too Sweet”.

We recap Seth and Cody yet again before the…

Main Event: Contract Signing between Olmos, MVP, and Bobby Lashley

Let’s be honest, if you’ve seen one of these you’ve seen all of these. The guys sit down, Adam Pearce asks for three signatures. MVP reviews his talking points with Lashley, that Bob would be nothing without him. Lashley rebuts, saying MVP was a leech and Bob never needed him. All three men sign the contract, then Bobby flips the table and it’s a melee! Security runs down to get murdered by both Lashley and Olmos, and MVP and Olmos escape as Cedric Alexander runs in and attacks Lashley from behind. Bobby drops Alexander but eats an Olmos boot, and the heels set up a table in the corner of the ring. Olmos goes for a powerslam but Lashley evades him and hits a spear to end the show.

Man, that sure was a lot of wrestling show. The recaps were a little much, but at this point we know how WWE does things so what are you gonna do? Some fun sounding matches were added to Hell in a Cell, although I’m pretty sure Cody v Rollins remains the only match that will actually take place in the cell for now.

If watching three hours of wrestling isn’t your jam, let’s catch you up with tonight’s Five Good Things:

1- Becky’s opening promo and the ensuing Asuka vs Bianca match were a fun, exciting opening to the festivities! Becky was throwing out some fantastic lines tonight, and Asuka and Bianca Belair are two amazing talents who can put on a great match weekly.

2- The Mysterios, Ezekiel, Alpha Academy, and KO had a really fun, action packed match as well. The story between Owens and Ezekiel continues to make me laugh, and the Mysterios looked really good and motivated tonight as well.

3- Miz TV with the Street Profits was funny enough, and the interrupting 24/7 stuff was silly but not terrible. The Profits are so good on the mike, it’s almost to their detriment.

4- The Usos and Riddle / Shin was a decent match as Riddle summoned his inner Randy Orton in several spots. The finish wasn’t the best, especially since it was the same as the one used in the previous match on the card, but I think it sets up a match (maybe in the Cell) on Sunday? We’ll find out on Friday.

5- Rhea and Liv did their best, just fast forward past the interminable beginning sequence. But not the entrances themselves, as Rhea got some new music and I kinda like it! 

Rhea and Liv pair well as enemies and since WWE retains their boys vs boys/ girls vs girls formula, I imagine they’ll stay opponents for a while longer.

And that’s it! We have Hell in a Cell Sunday night, so I’ll probably watch SmackDown for the combo pack of Rampage Report/ Side of SmackDown on Saturday. I’ll put together some predictions on Sunday and recap the show on Monday, as per usual. 

I appreciate you stopping by, and would love it if you drop your thoughts in the comments section below. You can also follow me on Twitter @ElOsoPequeno, where I try to remember to post whenever I update the blog. I recap Raw, Dynamite, and Rampage weekly, and also plan to write about any other wrestling that I happen to watch. There’s also a weekly wrap up on Fridays, and I’ll do predictions before any big AEW or WWE pay per premium live events. 

Have a good one!